i am not sure where this is going but.....

...life seems to be in a weird place at 29...if you would have asked me 10 yrs ago, what my life would be like at 29, i would have said...a job, maybe engaged or married, maybe even married with kids...i don't even know if i would even have an answer.

i am living though, and i am not sure where this is going to take me, but it is taking me as long as i am ready to go with it...it will keep going...i will have this new chapter ready to go to the next decade and even if you ask me what the next 10 yrs holds for me, i might make some assumptions but i can't tell you...b/c life isn't about knowing every step, it is more about living for what the next step can be...& realizing that the next step may not be what you expect but at the same time it could be one hell of ride!

what do you know...

what do you know, a whole lot of nothin'...or so i thought....

i totally think of myself as being in the know...however i think it is better some times if you are in the not know, then you are less likely to get hurt....

as we grow older we learn lots of things, and some of those things are things we wish we would have never learned. is life better that much easier if you don't know or are you being chicken sh*t if you live in la la land of the not knowing. i don't know i am torn, there are days when i wish i didn't know something, but then there are days i cannot get enough information....i know i am speaking in the vague sense, you are in the unknown....ultimately you are going to find out, which you wouldn't rather know before it is too late...hmmmm?

"girl walks into the room, everyone is staring at her....she can't figure out what is going on, she frantically looks up and down at herself, nothing is out of place....she does the subtle wipe of the nose and then looks at one of her friends for the booger & teeth check....all good...all of sudden her best friend, the man of her dreams, her everything, slowly approaches her and gets down on one knee, & says, "will do the me the honor, of being my person for the rest of my life"...she looks down, "wouldn't want to be anybody else's person"..." she was better off not knowing, to get the surprise of her life....

the quest to expand my brain...

well one should never stop learning...or at least that is what i keep telling myself...i actually like learning (if you would have told me that 6 years ago i would have said no freakin way; well just as life has a way of surprising us; here is another one)...it is fun to learn when you are interested in a topic...i am taking classes to become an interpreter for the Deaf..i should have listened to my mom (another lesson--another blog post later) & finished my degree a way long long time ago but i am now doing it so chuck one up to not listening to a much smarter woman than me :)...not so smart...

well i also decided it would be great to learn other things as i get older...i have decided my next language to learn is Arabic, not bc i want to be some interpreter for the government...but bc when i go into a Middle Eastern bakery and everybody and their mother are speaking Arabic i know what the hell they are talking about and can order in Arabic...then i don't have to look like the white girl who has no idea...it is kind of like street credit...

& i have always always wanted to learn, my grandparents were both from Lebanon, and both spoke it fluently but that is where it stopped...my mom understands it but cannot speak it (back when she was growing up, not the coolest to be different--think bringing pita bread sandwich to school rather than sandwich on white bread, not the coolest kid, then)...& she wishes she would have kept using it, but didn't....anywho...now my turn and I want to learn!