one of life's greatest pleasure is coloring...

day 5

a new box of crayons, a million sharpies, sharpened color pencils & then a beautiful coloring book with nothing between you & the pages but color...what a great way to hang out with your nieces, nephews, young cousins or yourself (no i am not weird)...have you ever sat down as an adult & colored so amazing...i will admit that when my nieces & nephews try to start coloring on my page i get a little peeved (yes i am 2 yrs old, i am owning it); if they are going to color they must do it right...in the mother flippin' lines, that s%&* is not cute when they start scribblin' all over the place & you parents/grandparents that think it is are just feedin' your kids some bull@&#%, its not...who wants to put scribbles on their fridge, sure as hell not me (don't worry i know what you are thinkin' my nieces/nephews & maybe one day my kids might need some therapy; they are going to need it more for the other crap they go through not colorin' & besides we have a counselor in the family = family discount = free)...i am keepin' it real...

now i digress, the art of coloring is to be enjoyed no matter your age, even if you are going on to 30...another thought just ran through your head, she is either on something or somebody needs to show her a good time...i am stone cold sober but i will take the good time who is buyin'?...there is just something peaceful about grabbin' a coloring book and coloring it until there is nothing left to color...and everything just looks right...could it be that within in a coloring book everything is the way you see it & you have complete control, hold the phone, way to deep, get your head out of the clouds it is coloring book & all that goes with it & it sure is f*&^(* AHH-MAZING!

get your color on no matter your age...

over the years i have worked...

day 4 (i forgot which day i was on; which i guess is a sign of old age)...

i think i shall take a minute and discuss the elements of my working ability...by trade i am in education (special & deaf)...however i decided in my 24th year i would quit the kids, might as well try to kick a bad habit (i am kidding i LOVED my students it was the other s%#@, that i could not stand; have a conversation with a teacher, you will see in the first 5 minutes, 2 seconds of the conversation what i am preachin')...i decided to adventure into the big bad world and seek a job in a not-for-profit, b/c literally i would volunteer everyday of my life (but a stupid thing called bills & money get in the way, so i shall not be looking for love but a man who has a huge wad in his pockets & adores me so i can volunteer all the time; sorry i digress)...

so i was on the hunt, looked all over, ohh wait, i probably should mention this is also the time the economy decided to tank & no one wanted to hire someone with zilch experience...so what does any self-respecting teacher do, STRIP, come on (first if you have seen me, people would pay me to put my clothes back on) & that is so not me...i decided to wait tables for my brother, cause that is what people with not 1 but 2 degrees do when the family owns a restaurant (are you envisioning my big fat greek wedding, & did i mention his name is nick; yes i know i could star in the movie, LITERALLY)...in addition to being  a lifer (which even though now i got out of the business, i sincerely miss it, cash people, at your finger tips) i also substitute taught (yes i quit teaching to go teach someone else's class, hello it was damn good money; remember rich husband not there yet)...it was great i took jobs when i wanted & then hung up when i didn't want to, hung out taught kids & at the end of the day the bull$*#^ stayed & i left...

there i was waiting tables, substitute teaching, & looking for a job (having no luck)...but i did some of the most amazing things, went on vacations without taking time off (you don't make money; but you also don't get the time back in your life), hung out with my family without worrying about time...for those years time disappeared & it was so AHH-MAZING...time being a funny thing, we jam pack so much into a day that some times we forget just how precious it is & how little of it we have...so without getting to emotional & mushy (a little late) i am glad i did it prior to 30...if you ask me, we should retire when you are younger, enjoy life, what the hell, you get old & nothing works anyways might as well work then...there was my stint of semi-retired, i contributed to society a little, so i wasn't full retired...

after my little stint in semi-retirement, i decided ok i must get back out there and start looking for other jobs, maybe even go back into teaching full time...well here is the slight issue with teaching the Deaf, either there are jobs or there are not...so i was going to move & then i decided, chocolate was my calling (or rather my Godfather had a small company that needed some one to jump in), so i travelled the 5 hours to michigan and checked it out...& ended up taking the job...it was what i needed & God knew that...he knew i was ready for a change...to leave Ohio and go some where, not too far that i couldn't touch the people i love but He knew i was ready & to also start a new adventure...so the adventure has been going on for a little over a year & there is a purpose (still figuring it out, i said i am hitting 30, not flippin' 90; i only know so much)...& i miss parts of the jobs, well more so the people...you kind don't realize it was all about the people until you don't see them anymore...& i am blessed that the people i have met thus far are pretty stellar...SO a new chapter awaits in me in the land of chocolate & michigan :)...

hold the phone, a little seriousness just happened-- it will from time to time, i am getting old, we like to reminisce about the past...here is to all the working fools, may each day always bring a new adventure or at least a good story :)...& remember take it from someone with experience, be careful with time, it is a precious gift!

ps sorry little bit obsessed with the strikethrough (way cool feature)...

& we are tryin to lose the a*% yet again, really...

day 3...(technically it is still today(1/3) in california so i did not miss a day)...

one of my resolutions is 30 before 30, no it is not 30 donuts in one setting or 30 hook ups, it would be removing the 30 rolls that surround different regions of the ole' body...i know, i know what you are thinking, well 2 things you are thinking..."we have to listen her rant & rave about food & her fat face not being able to eat it" or she is going to start this s%&# again only to not finish it & then we have to hear how fat her a*& still is"....

no for real i am doing it, this might be it you know what they say it is that much harder to lose it after you hit 30, things want to linger a little longer (wait i thought that is what they say when you hit 25, why they keep lyin')...so i am going to do it prior to 30 well at least 6 months, and i am going to be dedicated...exercise & diet (probably with the occasional i would rather exercise the REM cycle & that cookie won't hurt me, fallin' off the wagon, thank God for the 6 months kind of exercise & diet) now until the foreseeable future & hopefully by the time August 15th rolls around my a*% will be lookin' good!...

so here we go, day 1 of dieting & exercise, complete...did not too bad, must keep it going for at least 13 more days to form a routine...hold your breath the fat train is leavin'....

2nd, am i already losing it...or already in love....hmmm

day 2...

well..."they" (whoever they are, does anybody really know) say that if you do anything for 2 weeks straight you can maintain that routine of behavior...well i am two freakin' days into my new 30-ish lifestyle and i was like what the hell am i going to say today about the becoming of my gracious age...so here is day freakin' 2 of the land of 30....

i am single have been for the majority of my life...& i am quite used to it...however at this point in my life i am ready for someone to want to be with me & do things with me (mind out of gutter please); so yes mother, i am ready to venture into the land of love...actually what i truly want is someone to grow old with, who always thinks i am funny even when i am not...who loves me for me despite all that entails...who enjoys my company if we are out in public or even in the privacy of our own home...who knows all the fun & some times not so fun details about me & still wants to hold me at the end of the day...who will do the dishes or clean up the kitchen for me b/c he knows i am too tired to do it...who looks at me at any age & thinks how did i get so lucky & how did my wife get so beautiful...who will hold me tight & is also willing to let me go too...who knows that i am someone who they cannot live with but who also they cannot live without...who challenges me each & everyday to be the best me...who knows that i am their soulmate & is willing to fight for me no matter what & knows that i am their everything...

i want the fairytale....i am a hopeful romantic...i believe that love is a risk but if you are willing to take that risk it can be the greatest adventure of your life, especially when you are with the person you are supposed to be with...

so i know you are looking for (or maybe not) the juicy details, rather my track record, as i will not indulge it all once (hell we have 364 days left & there aren't too many stories, i have to save somethin') but i will let you know i am hot "freakin' mess when it comes to relationships...i can tell anyone, anything but when it comes to my heart i completely shrivel up into a pile of nothin'...i don't know why, but the words can barely come out of my mouth & most of the time i super over think (think annoying girl who doesn't leave guy alone) every action i do...then in the end i usually turn my emotions off or drive people (the boys i like) away...whose ready for a diagnosis??  maybe not that but maybe just maybe in the year of 30, i say what i mean no matter what could happen, & maybe just maybe this year i get him...we shall see, more to come (i know i just ended it like that; so you have to come back tomorrow b/c i could add more; hmmmm...)

to love in 2012, the year of 30!

here we go again...& the resolutions of what could be...

intro...to the many days o'30...
&...day 1


as the first official day of 2012...we all think about the ways to improve upon our lives in the upcoming year...1/2 of which end up not coming true because our human nature gives up or rather our lack of will power...then we vow that the next year will be different...so what makes this year different for me & my so called resolution...


well i am turning 30...so i have many resolutions...one of which is blogging everyday, 365 of the many days of me and my 30ness...some of which will be about the days passed, others about the days of now, and then of course those that follow the turning of the gracious age...


so brace yourself...it is going to be a whole lot of me & how i approach the next decade and chapter in my life...


2012 resolutions...which of course you will either hear more about or rather not hear another damn word b/c it failed miserably;)...i think i am going for 10 hoping to aim for accomplishing 1/2...hell if i get more than that i already doing better that i initially thought...


1.  a little blog time, or at least 365 days of it...
2.  30 by 30, by my actual birthday, my ass must be 30 lbs. less than it is that current time frame...
3. along with shrinking the size of the ass & the hips, i will be exercising more, a little bit of walkin' & maybe some yoga; this is a plan in the very early stages...
4.  i must learn how to drink black coffee & wine, i am going to be 30 & it is time to step up the sophistication game :)
5.  letting things go...there is so much that consumes are life, some we can fix others that we just need to walk away & let go...
6.  read more, you will also benefit from this, b/c it could improve the way i write or i will have better stories to tell (i would bet on the latter of this statement)
7.  meet people in the city i live in...its about time i have been there over a year...
8.  cherish every moment (ps. 90:12)
9.  faith & keeping it, holding on to it, it is the essence of who & what we are & without what else is there... 
10.  professional goals...success, which i define as a growth--for my current job, to work towards becoming an interpreter, & write, keep writing until its finished & (maybe put myself out there)...


ok some make sense, some don't, and most of them will unfold and be explained over the next 365 days...here we go, & happy 2012!

Accessories...please read on..

Accessories-- NO MATTER what size you are, they fit...so if you are a 2, a 12, or a 22, they fit and usually look fabulous...so buy them if you are trying to lose weight or if you are gaining...there is no losing in this situation...

Bring on the rings, the bags, the scarves, the hats, the shoes...anything that doesn't require a size of your ass...& rock the sh*t out it...

i am just sayin', why do you think they were created, so you could feel good about yourself wearing the same blingin' ring the skinny B*otch, is wearing next to you!

Enough Said, now what are you waiting for...get yourself some....

the little moments...

those little moments, that allow a smile to creep on your face & your heart to soar, and carries us to the next moment, providing hope that someone else can see what they saw...

...so at work today, a man who was dropping off supplies came in and we started chatting...he turns to the other woman i work with and says, "she has the most beautiful smile." which instantly makes me smile...and that was that...the little moments, ahh that is what makes life sweeter.