it was a close call..

95 days (5 more & then day 100 of a million day journey)...

**disclaimer 576...go ahead & buy that secret indulgence, and then pass it off to someone else...take a bite, satisfy your craving & then walk away from it...your belly is happy & your ass didn't grow, it is a win -win situation...

...today was a weird diet day & i came close to jumping off the edge into a pool of fat like 10 times but i pulled through...i managed not to eat my entire chinese meal, thank you very much to my brother who saved me...it actually worked out perfect because i got enough of what i wanted and he finished off the rest especially because we all know that you can eat chinese food leftovers for like a week straight (& i prefer cold, day old chinese food to fresh any day)...so i would have put it to my ass for several days & my brother saved me...so find a friend or family member who you can pass off your bad food decisions too...they will thank you later or rather curse you later...i also enjoyed little tastes of my niece & nephews food throughout the night...another tip: just take bites they add up to almost no points, just ask my ass on the weeks when all i had was a taste of that cookie, or a lick of that ice cream, or a bite and half of french fries...i said it was a tip, not a great one that you should diet by...

day 95...lost track of my points, i had too many little bites, but i did not go crazy...and i had ONE double stuff oreo cookie (another love of mine) & then i decided not to go for the second, snaps for me...

...until "no more close calls" tomorrow...

ohh the words....

day 94...

**disclaimer 291...words can be damaging; however they can also be very powerful...so when your fat ass friend goes on a diet make sure you provide the powerful ones, no matter how much you want to say "hey fat ass, i thought you were on a diet, why you eatin' that donut?"

...since i have been back i have had some very meaningful, encouraging words thrown my way & it is definitely helpful on the bumpy, lumpy (wait that is my thigh) diet road...i think that it is often times the one thing that keeps us, dieters (yep, i officially put myself in that group) going (let's be serious, it is not all the "fun" food; if that was the case, hell we would all be skinny)...it is the fact that people take notice of your ass not looking like the great state of ohio, or that your hips have shrunk & your brother who normally utters a comment like "hey thunder thighs" instead says, "damn you did lose some weight."...these provide us a little more steam to keep pushin' & might even be the difference maker when deciding whether or not you want to have ice cream or go with the berries instead (not always but definitely some times)...so my tip for the day...~~spread the love (hold the fat, keep the cookie to yourself) & share some words of encouragement today with your friend who everyday wakes up & thinks what food is going to try take me down today...they will reciprocate later when you become the fat ass (yeah that is right, think before you say those damaging words, because guess what; karma is a b*tch, trust me i know;)

...94 days...i feel like i have started all over, i have to get my rhythm back...thank you for your words, much appreciated....

...27 points, i went for the coffee drink....

...until "more successful day because of you" tomorrow...

i almost forgot, but i am back & fatter than ever (kind of)

~week 14...weigh day (a day late)

~days 89 - 93...

~weigh day...not the greatest of news but i gained 3 pounds; so my total loss went down to -10.5 pounds...(i almost cried but i kept it under gaining 5 pounds; so i was able to control myself from wanting to cry, then go eat a candy bar or 2)...

**disclaimer 627...after being on a diet for a period of time (yes, i am going to say it), your body gets used to a certain way of eating...& when you deviate away from that way of eating your body lets you know it;)...

what a couple of days & what a way to eat through them...i ate everything from chips to cookies, to popcorn, to cake and pasta....i went crazy i can't even tell you i held back, i did not and my body felt every single part of it...i think my body was saying to stop eating but some how the food kept up ending up in my stomach...i fat breathed like 10 times & at one point or another i thought i saw my ass expand...and to be honest i remember thinking, i need to go back to my diet eating (yes i was just shocked as you are as you read that statement)...my body was saying (& often times screaming), stop eating and give me some good food...i was all out of whack...and so today i came back pretty strong and i am feelin' better for doing so...note to self, when the cake comes a callin', think twice before you dive in face first...

**week 14, 89 - 93 days...ohh how the days have come and gone and i have added 3 pounds (i wonder how that happened)...

**& i forgot to mention i almost forgot to blog, & i am almost decided i could wait one more week to start back up, but i was persistent & made it through the day...and i am hoping to be back on top starting with having my ass dropping off again;)

**24.5 points not too bad...so until "another diet day" tomorrow...

**ps, worst of all aside from the ass expansion, i missed you...

ohh my holy fatness....

days 85-88...week 13...

**disclaimer 163...(& maybe i have said this before)...however go big or big home; & that is what happened over the last couple of days...

i know you missed me & i just need you to bare with me for a few more days of me not being constantly in your life & then next week i will be back, all asses in...again i will be gone for a couple days (i have such an exciting life), with for real, no computer access, so just reread my old blog posts (yeah that sounds like lots of freakin' fun) & i will be with you every step of the dieting way (barf, that was lame)...so tuesday will be the weigh day & then i do not anticipate anymore leaves of absence in my dieting (it is probably better that way; otherwise we would be in big trouble;)...

...so yes, this past monday i did weigh myself, and i think i either lost a 1/2 of pound or stayed the same, which will make no difference come next week because i have been bad, like a fat kid in a free candy store, bad...i was celebrating, so i decided to have a feast (not just one day but everyday)...& i was also traveling & who wants to be on a diet when you are around fabulous food of another state or city (so food i ate & the ass will grow)....i ate this amazing breakfast with apple chicken sausage & yes it was so tasty...& then later on this week i had chicken wings (which i love because they are tasty & fried)...and you can fill in the blanks on the other crap i ate...i did try to control myself but when spinach & artichoke is calling your name, you have to dive in...

...did i also mention that i did about a 1/2 second of exercise and the rest of the week consisted of me exercising my foot on the gas pedal...so all in all it was an extremely successful week for dieting, i mean eating...we shall see how much damage i do come next week...

...thanks for being patient with me...

...don't worry i will be back to fill your lives with dieting fun...

...85 - 88 days have come and gone & i might have increased my ass size...

...until "back to the grind" on tuesday...

p.s...did i mention i miss you too;)...

Christ rose from the Dead... & I ATE!

83 3/4 & 84 days...Happy Easter...

**disclaimer 39...a holiday is a holiday, might as well enjoy it and eat your face off because as tomorrow sets in so shall your reality of just how big your ass has grown in one weekend ;)

...Easter, a holiday, another reason for me to enjoy some eatin'...yummy, yummy in my tummy...but i will still stand on that scale and take a deep breath & look down to see the number...& even if i do not report the tip of the scale tomorrow night i promise at some point i will let you know what is up with me & my body...

over the course of this blessed weekend...i was blessed with some food, one of my indulgence was an iced venti soy caramel macchiato blended, "omg" it is one of my absolute favorite drinks & i enjoyed every minute of it...i also had potatoes, roast, corn, turkey, chips, veggie & dip, pretzel jello x 2 servings, some candy...maybe i should tell you what i didn't eat...and i am actually considering asking my mom to make me some homemade popcorn...i know totally acting like a true fat kid...& when you play you pay, so.....

days 83 3/4 & 84...got to love me some holidays...hope you all had a nice Easter, blessings to you and & your families...fingers crossed & prayers for weigh day...

until "a weigh day & a few days more maybe" tomorrow...

a slight delay but lo' & behold a post...

day 82 & 83 1/4....

**disclaimer 29...patience is a virtue...and is it one hell of virtue when it comes to dieting & waiting for your ass to shrink...

i apologize for my delay in posting...was a little preoccupied with my busy schedule (in other words i ran out of time in my day; insert laughing cause we all know i am semi-retired & don't have a busy schedule...)

first thing is first let me explain what will happen in the upcoming week...i am on vacation, hell i am always on vacation ask my family but i am going some where other than my vacay home, beautiful toledo, oh, i am going to chicago & illinois wesleyan during the course of the week...so access to a computer will be spotty & i am not promising a post everyday next week, i will try my bestest to update you...

2nd lent is finished (for 40 days we fast from different foods, like Jesus fasted in the desert for 40 days & forty nights), my point in telling you, is that i am giving myself a "yippee week"; meaning i will not be following the points to the "T" (insert another laugh; cause we all know i struggle anyways on a regular basis, so what is new)...& besides i am going to want to eat fun things while on vacay:)...i am hoping nothing crazy because we do not want to repeat losing every part of my ass all over again...so just a little fun and then back to business...

so folks you have been so wonderful, just hang with me for one crazy fun food filled week & don't worry we will get back on track...besides dieting is like a roller coaster anyways, & this upcoming week will be one hell of ride...

...lastly yesterday was ok...had this amazing salsa my sister in-law made with black beans, corn, avocado (my favorite as we all know), onions (i hate but will manage as long as don't see or hear the crunch in my mouth), salt & lime juice, which i think was pretty healthy & it tasted so so good, it actually was my dinner, not exactly the best planned out dinner, but it tasted great & satisfied my hunger...

82 & 83 1/4 days...we discussed a schedule & for all those who want to stalk me have at it...but i will keep you posted, especially if i am eating amazing food, pray i do not go crazy,

...until "for sure posting" sunday...(i am going to have to tell you of the fun easter food)

i gained 5 pounds in one day...must have been that sundae, the piece of cake, the soda, the french fries, the....

APRIL FOOLS...cheesy, but i had to do some thing...

day 81....

~~exciting news, 203 people have viewed my profile (thanks for telling your friends, keep it up, you are doing a great job;)...i don't think that is a big deal but i am excited...my weight is going down & more people are checkin' me out (i am cheesy all over the place today)...

**disclaimer 320...even though we complain about dieting (well maybe it is just me)...clothes do look better on you, probably because there is no bulges sticking out or overflowing fat...

...i substitute taught today and i was so lucky that the PTA brought in lunch for the teachers and i got the benefits of being in the building...i kept it together and did not get all crazy on the food...they had a baked potato bar (way good, baked potatoes & then you add whatever fixin' you want, can we say a fat kids dream)...and then they had salad & desserts...i had a potato with butter, parmesan cheese (a good cheese to eat with not a lot of fat), & sour cream (i adore sour cream;)...and a salad with light dressing...and 1 (yes, only 1) cookie (i actually left the room after i made my plate, probably to avoid the temptation of wanting another cookie)...& i split some cheetos with my students (which meant i did not feel the need to finish the whole bag by myself; dieting tip: pass off some food to other people, then a.) you are not eating alone & b.) half the calories;)...yeah i am a thinker)...so for the day i am going to give myself a pat on the back...& i finished off my day with cereal, so all in all that was some good eatin' today...

81st day...24 points & all that food, damn i'm good...

...until "another satisfying day of eating"